Viewtiful Mario
by Ironic Eraser
Summary: The most unlikeliest team ever to step foot on the gaming world. A mixture of Capcom and Mario collide together. The Mario Bros. and Viewtiful Joe form up a team to stop the evil King Bowser and the infamous Emperor Jet Black!
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1 **

**Goombas become a problem**

Just outside of Mushroom Kingdom is a small house. In that house were two plumbers named Mario and Luigi. Brothers were they and inseparable, unless you count those times when Mario and Luigi both gain Hand Powers, test Hammer Abilities, and countless other occasions. Mario was the eldest, but short for his position, but nonetheless the eldest. He always wore a red bureau with blue work pants and a red shirt. Aloft on his hat was a letter M within a white circle. Mario had a scruffy mustache and an Italian accent. Luigi was similar to Mario in every way except he was taller. Unlike Mario, he wore blue jeans and a green shirt. Luigi's mustache was a cleaner one and straighter with a curly end. Together they are an unstoppable team.

Meanwhile, usually found in darker areas, was Bowser's castle. Who was Bowser? In his area he was notified as King Bowser, king of the koopas. Bowser is often described as a big turtle with a spike shell, not found on normal koopas. Bowser, instead of normal koopas, had an abnormal fire breath that he breathes out in about 30 feet of length. His melee attack would be his razor sharp claws. In the position of king he leads an infantry of koopas and goombas which often lead to a threat to destroy Mushroom Kingdom. In this case, this is where the Mario Bros. come in. Equipped with only their hammers (and if necessary, a toolbox) and items they embark on a journey to defeat the evil Bowser. And after Bowser being beaten into pulp they are usually the heroes who save the day.

If you are wondering about the damsel in distress, that would be Princess Peach…or Princess Daisy. Usually Bowser takes Peach as ransom for whatever he pleases. Princess Peach or Princess Daisy is usually the motivation of the Mario Bros. Princess Peach usually is identified with a big peach dress (mainly pink), blond hair, white gloves, and a crown. Princess Daisy is similar to Princess Peach, but she has a yellow dress and brown hair.

Now back to the storyline. There Bowser sat, on his throne, a bruise aloft his eye and a cast set aside his throne. He had been pretty beaten up bad by the Mario Bros. this time. His leg was broken, along with his arm, ribs, and other parts of his body. _Damn those Mario Bros. They thwarted my plans ONCE AGAIN! I need an accomplice. Someone who could help me beat those annoyingly persistent Mario Bros. _

Suddenly a few meters away, the door burst open and in came a shadow like samurai.

"I heard you needed some assistance Bowser," the shadow said.

Bowser looked simply baffled. "And who are you?"

"Emperor Jet Black," the shadow answered.

"Hey wait a minute!" Bowser exclaimed. "You're from Capcom! You're not one of us!"

"That," Emperor Jet Black started, "doesn't matter. We're in the same family group of Nintendo. Now I'll be glad to assist you if you first help me with my problems."

"What problems specifically," Bowser asked.

"You have to help me kill my enemy: Viewtiful Joe."

Bowser looked sarcastically. "Viewtiful Joe? What kind of lame name is that?"

Emperor Jet Black laughed. "The name might sound funny now, but if he beats you, you're gonna look ten times worse than you already are now."

Bowser looked with a certain scared look.

"You take care of Viewtiful Joe and I'll handle the so-called Mario Bros."

Emperor Jet Black disappeared and suddenly reappeared right in front of Bowser. He took out his hand from his shadowy cape and said simply, "Deal or No Deal?" Now if you watched the TV show "Deal or No Deal" then you would already know that Bowser was biting hard on his lip not to laugh suddenly. Bowser took Jet Black's hand and shook it. Emperor Jet Black smiled deviously as he knew the first part of his plan was finished.

Back in the happy area of Mushroom Kingdom, Luigi was picking berries for a pie he was making for himself. He had a basket in one arm and his free arm picking the berries. He pranced around the Fields of Toads where a special VIP would be the only thing to let you in and pick from the Toad's fields. Suddenly, goombas appeared in front of him. Normally goombas would be small biting piranha like creatures with only a head and shoes, but these goombas were far much bigger than the normal ones. There were three big goombas with actual hands. Although they were about Luigi's height, Luigi was nonetheless freaked out. Luigi let out a small squeal of help that wasn't noticed at all. The other Toads in the field took notice of such goombas and ran away.

"Should we attack?" the left goomba asked.

"Yes," the right goomba said.

"He is still," the left one said.

"Only HUMAN," the middle one said darkly.

Knowing perfectly that what the goombas had said was one of the phrases of _The Matrix Reloaded_, Luigi grinned and took out a pair of sunglasses from his pocket.

"It's _Neo_ time," Luigi said.

Immediately the theme music of _Starfox_ in the battle sequences took place. The three goombas moved closer to Luigi. Using his faithful martial arts, he charged his power strike. The goombas successfully getting to Luigi stopped. Luigi released the awesome power of his power strike and the goombas went flying. Or that's what Luigi thought. Instead, instead of the awesome power of the power strike, he unleashed a simple tap on the goombas stomach. Luigi looking up at the goombas faces smiled nervously and cried, "MARIOOOO!"

Instantaneously at the speed of light Mario came. Technically he flew there. His yellow cape aloft him, he looked at the goombas and asked, "Who the hell are you guys?"

Mario being dumbfounded instead of letting them answer threw a fire ball at them. The goombas flamed up and ran in circles getting no where with the battle. In a few minutes they were dead. Mario smiled as he leveled up to LEVEL 2! As Mario began choosing his upgrades Luigi turned around to face himself with a red costumed guy.

Luigi jumped at the mere sight of the guy screaming while running in circles. The red costumed guy turned around to his "girlfriend" saying, "Wow, this guy has nerve problems."

The red costumed guy wore simply a red costume with a red helmet. He had a strange, devious-looking grin on his face along with an orange goatee. He had a pink scarf aloft his neck with white boots and white gloves. His "girlfriend" wore a blue skirt with a blue helmet, white boots, and white gloves. On her belt were two guns (which looked suspiciously like golden hair dryers) with hearts on the side. Mario, who finally finished upgrading, took notice of the two strangers.

"What are you doing?" he asked. "You guys are from Capcom."

"Yeah," said the red costume guy. He had a kind of "dude" accent in his voice.

"Well we need your help," the girl said.

"What kind of help?" Mario asked.

"Bowser's on the loose," the red costumed guy said, "With our enemy."

"Before I consider helping any of you, what are your names?" Mario asked.

The red costume guy smiled. "Viewtiful Joe."

_Okay so this is kind of short, but I wanted to finish reading Death Note #5 so it's not my fault…well actually yea…it is kind of my fault…anyways, please review…_


	2. I WANT A FLAMETHROWER!

**Chapter 2**

**I WANT A FLAMETHROWER!**

Mario stood in the plains of the Fields of Toads. He stared at the red costumed guy's girlfriend. His mouth was open wide and he was ready to drool.

"What's your name?" he asked the blue costumed girl.

"My name's Silvia," she replied.

_Woah…she's hot…_ Mario thought. Luigi having a similar mind of Mario read his thought. ESP it seemed for our Luigi. Luigi, unfortunately, couldn't agree more with Mario. Viewtiful Joe simply looked at them. Then he turned around to Silvia, his girlfriend, and frowned.

"You didn't have to come," Joe murmured.

"But I wanted to help you!" Silvia said quietly.

"Yeah, I understand but these guys are staring at you like some model!"

Silvia turned her attention to Mario and Luigi to find that Joe was correct.

"OK, OK, so maybe I shouldn't have come, but without me, there won't be any females in this story!" she said. "It's only right for women to be in a story! Or else people would just think that it's a homosexual story!"

Joe laughed and turned back to the Mario Bros. beginning to disgustingly drool.

"While we're on this journey," Joe started, "I would not like you to continue doing that with Silvia. If this continues, it'll interfere with your battle phases!"

Luigi nodded, snapping back into reality. Unfortunately, Mario had been still gazing at Silvia with interest. Joe sighed.

"This is what happens when Silvia's here," he said to Luigi. "Now you're going to have to witness the aftermath of this."

Joe pulled up his sleeves and cracked his knuckles. With that he dragon punched Mario in the face. Before Mario's drool could touch the floor he was knocked out of his feet and into the air. When he landed back on the ground he snapped and retained his residual self. But as Mario got up, he was knocked down again by an enormous spiky shell. The sky grew dark and red and the sunshine had faded. Most Toads throughout the Mushroom area raced back into their houses and secured the doors. The shell spun until it bounced on the ground. Bowser popped out of the shell, looking as menacing as usual and fangs bearing Mario getting up once again looked at Bowser frustrated.

"OK, Bowser," he said threateningly.

"I gonna flame you until you turn into nothing more than a black nothingness!"

Just as Mario was to throw a fire punch at our useless Bowser a black shadow appeared in between them and blocked the attack with his sword. The blade deflected the flame and slashed it into nothing at all. From his shadowy cape came blood red eyes and a disfigured, devious grin. To great spikes curled like a V shape on his dark helmet and his clothes were covered with black shadow. Emperor Jet Black had appeared and slashed Mario. His sword sliced through his clothes marking Mario with a bloody slit. Luigi grinned again thinking it necessary to impersonate Keanu Reeve's Neo, he took out dark shades.

Putting them on he said coolly, "It's Neo time."

Instead of a normal Luigi with sunglasses, his green hat turned black and instead of wearing a green shirt and jeans, he wore a black trench coat and black pants. Fully transformed he walked towards Bowser and Emperor Jet Black.

"Hiya, fellas," he said politely.

"You can't beat ME," Jet Black said slickly.

Luigi was lost. What was he supposed to say after that? Instead of repeating his first line again (which he planned to do) he threw a punch at Jet Black's face. For the first time, in many, he actually made the villainous villain fly off the ground and a few feet away from where Mario lay. Smushing (I know it's a weird word) some of the beautiful grass and berries of the Fields of Toads he got up furiously and took out his sword. _He BEAT me…ME!_ he thought hopelessly. _I can't believe some punk who watched "The Matrix" trilogies beat ME! Glorious ME! This is ruining my reputation!_

Bowser let out a little fact due to the fact that that same punch had happen to him earlier that day. Bowser then reacting to this turned to Luigi and opened his mandibles of death. With out question he let out a roar. Shades blown off he cast a worried look over his face. His hand was protecting his face and his left leg was up. When Bowser had stopped roaring, Luigi smiled and took a small box out of his pocket.

"M-m-m-mints?" he asked nervously.

Bowser roared again creating Luigi to turn around a run around in circles like a sissy screaming. Bowser looked with a skeptical look in his face and the laughed malevolently.

"AHAHAHAHA!" he chortled madly. "I, the great Bowser, have defeated one of the pitiful Mario Bros.!"

Just as Bowser was going to add in a very lame victory dance he was whacked in the behind and was lifted into the air. Mario holding a tennis racket had signaled Luigi to get his tennis racket out too. Luigi concurred and whacked Bowser back. Screaming in brutal agony, Bowser cried for help. But our villainous villain was doing something else, momentarily. In sight of Viewtiful Joe and Silvia he went and created an awful burly brawl. Multiplying into numerous of Jet Blacks he had circled around Viewtiful Joe and Silvia. With a grin, Silvia took out her guns and started blasting heart shaped lasers at the numerous of Jet Blacks multiplying numerously. Viewtiful Joe on the other hand never knew of his foe's multiplying abilities and difficulties had risen. With that Viewtiful Joe used a VFX effect and slowed down time.

Rushing down to the nearest store (the only one that kept moving) Joe demanded a flamethrower from the store.

"One flamethrower, please," Joe asked the store keeper.

"Show me the money first," said the store keeper.

"Look, I'm kind of battling my arch enemy here and could use one of your flamethrowers."

"Show me the money first!"

"Don't make me slap you! I want a flamethrower!"

"Show me the damn money first!"

"I WANT A FLAMETHROWER!"

"SHOW ME THE MONEY FIRST!"

Joe sighing finally gave up and paid the storekeeper mushroom coins that he converted. With the flamethrower at hand, he raced back to the brawl and time snapped back again. Whilst Joe was having fun with a flamethrower, Mario and Luigi continued playing tennis.

"15 Love," Luigi said.

He threw Bowser with all his might up into the air and smacked him down across the net. Bowser screamed with mercy but without even noticing the loud wails of Bowser, Mario ran across his side of the court and whacked it back to Luigi.

A few pain staking hours later…

"OW!" Bowser cried rubbing his poor bright red buttocks. "GENTALLY! GENTALLY!" Roy, one of Bowser's younger siblings, slapped on a gigantic bandage on his bruised up bottom. Emperor Jet Black, on the other hand, had lay on Bowser's hospital bed right next to Bowser's throne, all burned and severely injured.

"Well THAT went well!" Bowser said angrily at Jet Black.

"Shut up! I mostly did all the fighting!" Jet Black fired back.

"We both were whipped like whipping cream on strawberries," Bowser said.

"Dude, that doesn't make any sense at all," Jet Black said.

Instantaneously, a bird came in through the Great Door of Bowser and dropped them a message that read:

_Dear King Bowser and Emperor Jet Black,_

_Nice going there I hope Bowser's buttocks just fell off._

And instantly Bowser's buttocks drooped and fell off. Bowser screamed, hands slapped on his cheeks, of the horrible sight.

_Anyway, Emperor Jet Black, you should know better than to make a portal and crossover to the Shigeru Miyamoto plane. Although Emperor Jet Black and you (Bowser) have tried to eliminate us, you have failed miserably. I mean in Joe's matter, you totally suck. S o try and kill us again and we'll thwart your miserable plan. One more thing before we leave you alone: Seriously when you roar at people, make sure you minty breath._

_Sincerely,_

_The Viewtiful Mario Bros._

_PS: I'd like to say this again: YOU WERE TOTALLY WHIPPED LIKE ICING ON A CAKE!_

_Sincerely,_

_Viewtiful Joe_

Having read this Bowser and Emperor Jet Black looked at each other darkly. They said the words that only come out from the Imperial army from _Star Wars._

They both struck the air and cried, "CURSE YOU REBEL SCUM!"


End file.
